Reasons why I love my family

Various conversations via text and facebook after my two cousins found out I was pregnant:

M: Looks like there's going to be one more stocking on the couch at Nan's this year!

C: Hahaha Megan that's hilarious! I can't wait to see what the baby gets in it's stocking!!

M: Chrissie & Ashley-corn on the cob holders, hello kitty chapstick, and travel size   shampoo....that's what everyone gets in their stockings from their grandma, right?

C: You forgot shaving cream.

M:  well i didn't think the baby would need that yet...the other items are essential for a 1 month old though

M: So from what I just gathered from our texts, my parents knew and then I found out and then I told Chrissie. Chrissie was still the last to know something about the fam....somethings never change. If it makes you feel any better, I only knew seconds before you did.

C: Thanks guys! And I'm not the last to know, I forwarded Megan's text to Kelly and I'm sure she's already in bed and won't see it until tomorrow so she'll be the last to know :p

Me: Hahaha! maybe you have successfully passed on the curse to her then...

C: I hope so. I'm going to Christopher tomorrow so I'll keep you posted if I learn something knew or not.

                        M:  Start clearing a little spot on "the wall" in nan's dining room

                        C: Will do, I'll try and find you a good spot Ash!

M: Hope we don't have to take anyone down to do that...

C:  I make no promises....sacrifices may need to be made

M:  Chrissie, you need to show Nan the name "lafonquiqui" and see if she thinks she can fit that on an xmas ornament

And then my cousin Megan had these texts to send in reference to naming my child: 

"If it's a boy: Romeo, and I don't mean just any old Romeo, it needs to be pronounced "row-mayo" like in the Claire Danes/Leonardo Dicaprio version of Romeo and Juliet

For a girl: I just think Lafonquiqui has a beautiful ring to it...it will be super easy for Nan to puff pen onto an Xmas ornament." 

Let me stress again: I love my family.

My due date was changed to December 8th today.

I'm not sure I agree with this.
I really think I'm in my 8th week, but my ob/gyn said based on the beta results from my hcg, that's my due date.

Hmph.

Today, my blood pressure was significantly high. This really freaks me out. They seemed concerned, too. I have to go back in a week for them to retake it.

I talked briefly with my ob about a couple of things I wanted to do come delivery time. She seemed really laid back about it, which is good.

Now I just need to get this blood pressure down.

Week 8 Symptoms

via What to Expect: 

Fatigue: check! (!!)
Nausea and vomiting: Nausea, no vomiting
Food cravings and aversions: Hmmm, debatable. Yes and no, I would say. I've been craving pickled okra for days now. Bizarre, since I never eat it by itself.
Bloating: Triple check!
Increased sense of smell: Still not sure on this one.
Occasional headaches: Yes, and they're not fun :(
Occasional faintness or dizziness: Lord have mercy, yes. At least once a day, I feel like I'm drunk.


You know what? I'm thankful for all of this. It means this lil fighter is still growing, and will continue to grow. I love it, and I'll take whatever this pregnancy throws my way :)

Morningish Sickness.

So, I think I'm finally starting to experience some bouts of morning sickness.
Except, while it's guaranteed to usually happen in the morning, it continues at random times throughout the day. It's the strangest pattern--I wake up ravenously hungry, but then right after I eat and take my morning vitamins, it just suddenly hits me. Which means, my vitamins are probably making me feel bad. But this is strange, considering I haven't had any of this morning sickness until I literally hit week 8 (yesterday).

My question is, is it truly considered morning sickness if you don't throw up? I gagged twice when I was brushing my teeth, and once when I took my last vitamin...but thankfully, no upchucking. From what I've read, I have 4-6 weeks left of this. It doesn't necessarily hinder me immobile, but it's definitely been an nuisance.

I also think I'm experiencing heartburn. Is that what that burning sensation in my stomach is? Bleck. No bueno. 

I have my first prenatal appointment today. It should last 2+ hours. I get to choose a doctor, go over my medical history, and things like that. It's a lot of pressure, don't you think?

I may be as big as a house when this is all over with.

Food.

I find myself fantasizing about it during the day. I can eat what would normally make me full, and I'm still hungry afterward.

I just ate my second plate of spaghetti, so explain to me how I am still experiencing hunger pangs? It just isn't logical.
I really crave meat a lot. And fruit.

I had my first bizarre craving of my pregnancy today. Myself and some coworkers went out to eat for lunch, and I decided I wanted a fried shrimp sandwich with mayonnaise and lettuce on it. Granted, I used to eat this when I lived in Mississippi (they're called Poboys there) but they didn't give me what I asked for. Instead, I just got the shrimp and one piece of bread. So what did I do? I fit whatever shrimp I could on that piece of bread, and topped it with mayonnaise. Then, when I ran out of bread, I dipped my shrimp in mayonnaise and ate it up.

While I was eating this, I kept thinking "This is really disgusting," but I couldn't help how good it tasted.

I haven't really craved fried food so far, so today was definitely interesting :p

I haven't experienced any morning/afternoon sickness unless my stomach doesn't have something in it. This makes it really hard for me to not gain more weight than recommended. I'm constantly having to snack throughout the day. I've tried just drinking a lot of water, and that staves my hunger for about, oh, 20 minutes.

I don't understand how something so tiny can make me eat so much! -laugh-

Why my favorite jeans are tight now...

Took this while I was shopping at Old Navy last Thursday (April 12). Bought my first maternity work pants, which I now call my heaven pants :p So comfy! It's pretty much bloat, seeing as the baby is only as big as a blueberry. I've been downing water like crazy, which I think is partly to blame.

First belly photo! :)

Yes, I realize it's only baby bloat, but it's cool to see nonetheless!

My Scare.

I have been terrified of miscarriage from the moment I found out I was pregnant.

I have read time after time of women with PCOS who continued losing babies. I knew my body hadn't been prepped for a baby to stick, so it was always there in the back of my head, taunting me. Right before Easter weekend, when I still hadn't heard about my HCG results, I was tormented with thoughts. What if my Progesterone is low? (Progesterone is usually known to be low in women with PCOS, and it is a vital hormone for a successful pregnancy) What if by the time I find that out, it's too late for me to supplement with a pill form? Can I really wait a whole weekend not knowing if my numbers are good? These were the thoughts that continued to haunt me. Finally, that Good Friday, when I knew I wouldn't have the answers I so desperately sought after, I made a plea to God to take my worry. I had no clue at the time how He would. But literally the moment the prayer ceased, I felt a wave of peace wash over me, calming me. I didn't worry again the whole weekend. That Monday (April 9th), I found out that my HCG was great--4,475. I was relieved, and finally, I could rest in the pregnancy and the validity of it.

At midnight that night, I went to use the restroom. I was horrified when I saw that I was bleeding bright red, and that I'd passed a significantly big clot. I was hysterical. I thought I'd lost the baby. I kept asking God over and over again, "Why? Why would you give me this joy only to take it away?" I was frantic, and I wasn't in a good place at all. The next morning, I called and explained the situation, and my ob office said I could come in without an appointment. I was numb sitting in the waiting room. They led me to one of the patient rooms, and I just remember thinking how insensitive those rooms are to women who are experiencing the threat of a miscarriage. There were baby and parent magazines tucked in a nook, with black and white photos of babies framed on the wall. I just kept thinking "What would my baby have looked like? Why wasn't it given a chance?" I cried silently at first, then breathed deeply, reminding myself that I didn't have a definite confirmation that I'd lost the baby yet. As grim as the situation seemed, I couldn't give up hope.

After what was literally at least 45 minutes, I was taken to the ultrasound room. I was horrified at the flat screen tv on the wall. I would have to see an empty sac in cinema scope? I didn't know that I could handle that. But, I braved whatever little strength I had left, and crawled onto the table. The nurse began the ultrasound. I saw the sac at first, and I thought sure I was seeing things. But with a little shift of the tool, the nurse said simply "There's your baby." I literally said "Oh my God," at least five times, then began to uncontrollably praise God. Praises of "Thank you God, thank you Lord, thank you Jesus," flooded from my mouth, and I couldn't stop it as the tears rolled down my cheeks. She soon showed me its beautiful, tiny heartbeat, beating away at 115 beats per minute. I didn't even know I'd be able to see that at this point, much less hear that amazing rhythm in my ears as she turned up the sound. I couldn't believe it; I still had my baby, against all odds.

My little fighter's first picture! :) 

The doctor explained that I would be diagnosed with Threatened Miscarriage, which basically meant bleeding during pregnancy. He told me to expect some spotting, but that it shouldn't be an issue unless the consistency changed or became heavier. On an instinct, I asked about getting tested for my Progesterone. The doctor agreed, and that day I found out it was 10.5. That's a good number, but the doctor wanted to put me on Progesterone as a precaution. Right after I took the first pill, I stopped bleeding, and I haven't bled since :)

I can honestly say I never expected to write this post so soon...

My fertility journey has been anything but easy.

In July of 2009, I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I wasn't ovulating. I basically understood that I wouldn't conceive without the help of fertility meds. I attempted medicated cycles from July-December, to no avail. I decided to pause with my fertility journey, due to deciding to pursue a long-term mission trip to Asia. I was also diagnosed with Hypothyroidism in July of 2010, and eventually received a diagnosis of Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. All three diagnoses are obstacles for conceiving naturally.

After we came back to the states in January of 2011, I wanted to pursue trying to conceive again. However, we could never find financial stability through living in Florida (where we relocated after our mission trip) and I felt it wasn't the right time. I have been off of birth control since January of 2009, and have never gotten pregnant. 

After a year in Florida, I decided to see if my previous job (in Tennessee) had an opening. Miraculously, it did, in the same field I had left previously. It was as if God had literally provided a sun stands still moment for me to go on that mission trip and pursue His work in Florida, and now I was returning home. It was amazing.

From the Friday to Wednesday before we moved, I was sick with an upper respiratory infection. I was taking ibuprofen like crazy, and had a consistent fever for 5 days. I eventually was given antibiotics, and that helped clear it up just in time for me to move on Thursday.

After a week of living in Tennessee, I realized I hadn't gotten my period.
It didn't raise a red flag with me, knowing with PCOS that my cycle is ridiculously sensitive. I figured the stress of the move, combined with the sickness, probably threw me off. Then, from that Wednesday (March 28th) through Friday (30th), I spotted, mostly brown blood. I found this odd, since I hadn't spotted really ever before. On Sunday, April 1, I was unpacking some of my bathroom boxes, and found an old pregnancy test. I looked at the label, seeing it expired in April of 2012. I thought "what the heck" and nonchalantly decided to take the test the following morning.

To my complete shock, on April 2nd, I received a positive pregnancy test. I was almost certain it was giving me a false positive, because the test was expired. There was just no way I could be pregnant. I freaked out a little bit, trying not to get too hopeful in case it was a false positive. But the next morning, I received a clear second line on my First Response Early Result:

Excuse the blur. I need to get a camera--this was taken on my cell phone :p

By this point, I'm freaking out. I get a digital test and take it that evening, and it turns up positive. 

So lovely seeing those words :) 

Luckily, I manage to get an appointment that next morning (April 4th) and have a confirmed pregnancy test at the Dr.'s office. My HCG beta for that day was 4,475, which was good! I had to wait to receive those results until the following Monday though -_______- 

Besides the obvious, what I find truly miraculous is that my body was anything but primed for pregnancy. During conception week, I was running a constant fever of 101 or over, and I was taking ibuprofen and sick with an upper respiratory infection. By all accounts, this little fighter shouldn't have stuck. 

I will continue calling it my little fighter, because it has truly continued to defy the odds...